Years ago, where I had worked, there were those that enjoyed saying and doing unkind things behind my back. They thought I never knew or maybe at times, they just did not care. Though I did and I often heard their whispers and read their faces. Although, I held my head up and I acted as though it did not bother me or that I did not simply know. I would occasionally vent to my husband my hurt over it. I have learned through time though, that sometimes people enjoy being unkind to others, as there is something about themselves, that they do not like. In their meanness, they thought they could find wholeness. Wholeness only comes from goodness; and only a real relationship with God can truly provide that. Friend, God heard their whispers, saw their actions and examined their intentions. I am not angry at them though; I hope that they have since found their peace in themselves.

We cannot change another’s behavior, though, we can choose how we respond to their actions. I could have yelled at them in retaliation. Though we cannot ever put out a fire with fuel. Only water can wash away the flames that try to burn.  

I have since left that job and I am right where God has called me to be. I feel more at peace when not surrounded by those that try to tear me down. Sometimes we can leave an environment and sometimes it is not always that easy. I endured many years of this type of behavior before I was able to leave it. However, we always have the choice on how we respond.

Friend, the best thing we can do is offer prayer, when we want to offer a harsh word in retaliation. Walk away when the heat tries to draw us in. Give it to God, when we want to give them a piece of our mind. God is not blind to what an offender does and maybe in our peace they can find theirs. May we also remember, showing love where hate could be so easily given; further helps their bitter hearts.

Friend, if you are feeling the gravity of a person in whom needs healing; remember, God is just and He will see you through it. For the best way to win the war of cruelty, is not participating.

Erin Fitts-Brower

Romans 12:21 NIV

Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.

Deuteronomy 32:35 NIV

It is mine to avenge; I will repay. In due time their foot will slip; their day of disaster is near and their doom rushes upon them.”

Luke 6:27-28 NIV

“But to you who are listening I say: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you.