This generation of parenting looks rather different than the one in which I grew from. Many, though not all, well-meaning parents try to be friends with their children. Though it is a good idea to have a special bond with our children, we need to establish the boundary of parent and child. God blesses us with our children. We were not called to be their “bestie,” we were called to be their parent. To guide them, discipline them, protect and love them and most of all, teach them about God and help them nurture their faith. I know this is not popular opinion in today’s society. However, it is a truth that needs to be said. I am in no way a perfect mother and I love having a special bond with my children. I love them more than words can say. As I am sure you do too my friend. That is why I choose not to be their friend. Sometimes in their mind, I am the bad guy. When I discipline them and I don’t always let them have what they want or get their way. Being a parent is a beautiful and sometimes challenging responsibility and blessing. We were not instructed to be their friend; we were given the honor of being their parent. That means that sometimes we are not going to be their favorite person. That means that even when they do not always understand, if we raise them right, they’ll thank us later for it. If we treat them like an equal, we are doing them a disservice. We are their parent. It is our duty to raise them as God has called. Just like God our Father has instructed us, we must instruct our children. That means tough love at times. We can still have a loving and beautiful bond with our children as parents, without treating them like our equal. Friend, we are all human and there is no such thing as a perfect parent. We will all make mistakes sometimes. May we not let the mistake of not acting like a parent be one of them. May we love them and raise them as God has instructed; not what the world deems as acceptable.

Erin Fitts-Brower

Psalm 127:3 NIV

Children are a heritage from the Lord, offspring a reward from him.

Ephesians 6:1-4 NIV

Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. “Honor your father and mother”-which is the first commandment with a promise- “so that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth. Fathers, do not exasperate your children, instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord.

Proverbs 22:6 NIV

Start children off in the way they should go, and even when they are old they will not turn from it.

Proverbs 13:24 NIV

Whoever spares the rod hates the children, but the one who loves their children is careful to discipline them.

Proverbs 29:15 NIV

A rod and a reprimand impart wisdom, but a child left undisciplined disgraces his mother.