I have been thinking about my baby I miscarried a lot lately. For those that are unaware, I was pregnant and had a miscarriage in early February. It is so easy to think about the what ifs, when things happen differently than we had hoped. Though I am finding that sometimes our supposed to be, is not His meant to be. What we plan for is not always His purpose for our lives. It is easy to wonder why God allows for some things to happen so different then what we thought it would be. Or even at times, what we think it should be. I find myself often questioning why God allowed me to be pregnant, if only to take my baby with Him. Though I know not His why, I trust His reasons. Then I stop and think to myself that His plan must be pretty spectacular. For if despite my grief in what He chose, His plan was still even better. I am certain that someday whether here on earth or in Heaven I will see, that all His plans made sense; even during those times on my journey when they didn’t. In these times of grief that plague my heart, I can hang onto His promises like a remedy for all the parts that hurt. For I have found, now more than ever; that God has been faithful to me my whole life. I have to continue to remember that if He is always the same yesterday, today and forever; then He is not going to stop being faithful now. So even during hard times, when things are not easy, we don’t have the answers or the reasons; that He does. If He has been faithful through all of it, in His purpose; He will continue to be. I find that even when I am sad and my feelings are big and leave question marks in my mind; that I must go to God, who can supply the answers. Maybe not directly; but in His word there are so many reminders that He is with us. He has a season for our good and our hard; and He will never leave us in either of them. I just have to trust in what His word tells me. Take a breath and let God, be God. For He is faithful, I have to trust that my what ifs are answered with His because.  His not meant to be, is because He knows what is truly best, even if it is hard sometimes. That His plan is for our purpose, even if it looks different than mine. I remember His words, I reach out to Him who understands more than anybody and I know that my answer is simply, that He is God. He knows more than I. Even when I cry, it is Him I cry to.

  I do not know if you are going through anything hard or if you have gone through something hard in your past. I just hope that this is a reminder that hard happens sometimes; but God is faithful always. He has it all worked out, even if we are hurting for awhile or we have so many questions that race through our minds and hearts. We must remember His word and find our peace in it. We must go to Him in prayer and find comfort there. For sometimes yes; our supposed to be, sometimes is not His meant to be. Hang in there my friend, God has us.

Erin Fitts-Brower

Isaiah 55:8-9 NIV

“For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,” declares the Lord.“As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.

Hebrews 13:8 MIV

Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever.

Deuteronomy 31:6 NIV

Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the Lord your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you.”

Psalm 34:18 NIV

The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.

Jeramiah 29:11 NIV

For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

1 Peter 5:10 NIV

And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast.